Reflection
by Sombereyes
Summary: Natsuki may never say anything, but that doesn't mean her feelings aren't there. Just a small, simple, Natsuki POV, about her love for Shizuru. Kinda deep, kinda fluffy.


A/N: This is just a small one-shot from a Natsuki POV. Nothing more than that, just a tiny little request for a real life friend. I don't own Mai HiME. Please, read and review.

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She smiled at me that day. Her hair disheveled, lips pale, eyes of crimson tired. Still, she truly looked happy. It was, unearthly, the glow of the HiME star over us, an omen speaking all things depraved. Her love for me caused Shizuru to do some pretty mean things. Evil and demonic things. Then again, I'm not a saint, and Shizuru isn't the only sinner condemned. Still, when I looked in her eyes, the murderous intent was gone, like it had washed away. What was left, something innocent. Something soft and pure. She was elegant again, and even more than that, she seemed perfect then, just like that day.

The first time she ever spoke to me.

Shizuru, I never told you about everything I'd wanted to say. I never reached out my hand, and told you to come along. I'm sorry, I just didn't think of it. Having you by my side seemed so natural, I'd forgotten what it meant to be on my own, away from everyone, trusting no one. Before I knew it, I did, with you. I trusted you. I had faith in you. You were gentle, Shizuru, soft and sweet. I think, I let the calm side of you win over. It never occurred to me, that you could possibly be in love. Looking back now, every joke, tease, even the smallest glance to the side, it was all filled with your love. Wasn't it?

I was just blind.

I didn't think anyone would be capable of having feelings for me. Even the idea of friends back then, of having some of my own, it seemed impossible.

But...you were there. When no one else stood by my side, you were. I'm sorry I never noticed it, that my preconceived notion about the world had been so very wrong. Then again, knowing you, it wouldn't matter. Your own notions were just as false as mine, sometimes. Shizuru, when the battle happened, when you found out that you were a HiME, why didn't you just tell me? Why not open up, and pour your soul out? The things you went through were painful, and I know that. The madness, we couldn't stop it, though god knows we tried. You could have come to me, you know. If you had then, maybe, just maybe, I could have protected you too.

If we were lucky, we wouldn't have spiraled so far down.

Shizuru, do you remember what was on the other side of oblivion? I don't remember. I don't know what I felt. It hurt, when my body began to break apart into particles. The scene is horrifying to watch, I can't tell you how many times I had to see it, how many times I watched Mai break apart from the sight of it. It wasn't horrifying when it was happening to me though. Not that time, when we were holding each other close. I remember thinking, that it only seemed right. I remember thinking, that if I was going to die, I didn't want to go alone, and I didn't want you to suffer in my wake. I knew I wasn't going to live, but Shizuru, I was alright with that. I just, wanted you to be happy.

We aren't in oblivion anymore Shizuru.

We aren't in paradise, nor eternal damnation. We're still here. In a place where happiness and sadness tie around us so tightly, that we can only hold onto others. That's the only way to do things, if we have any hope of continuing on. I may have not noticed when I first started to smile, or when I began to feel like I needed you, and Mai, and Mikoto...everyone. But I do notice the sky now. How blue it is, how deep the ocean goes, I realize how beautiful life really is.

I know I never say anything, but you know how I am. I don't think I really need too, but I'm here, waiting for you. We never needed words back then, even though you came out and said them half the time. If you kiss me, I'll give back in return. If you need me, I'll be there for you. That's just what we're supposed to do, right? So...I've been thinking, if that's the case, why not? We need others, and I need you. Hey, what do you say to that, Shizuru?

Why not become happy, with me at your side?


End file.
